Skip to content

Why I Never Want to Be Self-Made

For most of my life, I thought being “self-made” was the ultimate goal. I admired the hustlers with nice cars and big titles. I believed if I just worked hard enough, long enough, and kept people at arm’s length, I’d get there too.

But now, looking back, I can say with full confidence: I never want to be self-made.

Here’s why.

Self-Made Left Me Empty

Chasing self-made turned me into a lone wolf. I thought independence meant strength, but really it just meant isolation. I burned bridges, hid my struggles, and tried to prove to the world that I was enough.

Even in the military, when I was put in charge of others, I realized how fragile that identity was. I wanted so badly to impress—but as one drill sergeant reminded me, “Any idiot can lead a platoon to the chow hall. What matters is what you do when it matters.”

That stuck with me. Because deep down, I knew he was right. My “self-made” hustle wasn’t going to matter in the moments that truly counted.

The Truth I Learned

The turning point came when I realized I was never self-made—I was always Kingdom Made.

God had used people at just the right time to speak into my life, walk beside me, and pull me out of the darkest places. Even in seasons of grief, trauma, and isolation, He sent people to carry me when I couldn’t carry myself.

Romans 1:12 says, “that you and I may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith.” That’s the Kingdom life. We need each other. Always.

Why I Choose Kingdom Made Over Self-Made

  • Self-made isolates. Kingdom made connects.

  • Self-made relies on pride. Kingdom made relies on God.

  • Self-made crumbles under pressure. Kingdom made endures through trials.

I never want to be self-made again because I’ve tasted something better. I’ve seen the beauty of community, the strength of faith, and the power of God’s people standing together.

A Challenge for You

Take a moment and ask yourself:

  • Where have I been chasing “self-made”?

  • What would it look like to invite others into my journey?

  • How can I live Kingdom Made this week?

For me, the answer is clear. I never want to be self-made. I want to live Kingdom Made—because that’s where real strength, healing, and purpose are found.

Related Posts