Big Emotions and Wise Decisions Don't Mix
Insights from The Weekly REBOOT
By: Evan Owens
Have you ever made a decision in the heat of the moment—one that felt right at the time but later turned out to be a mistake? You’re not alone. When emotions run high, judgment tends to get cloudy, often leading to commitments or choices we later regret.
Several years ago, I learned this lesson the hard way. I was washing my car in the driveway when a man in a truck pulled up, stepping out in a crisp chef’s uniform. He asked if my son and I liked steak, and after a dramatic sales pitch—including stories about a well-known steakhouse, his background as a chef, and his wife’s cancer battle—I found myself buying nearly $350 worth of meat.
It wasn’t until my wife got home and did a quick Google search that we realized I had fallen for a scam. The company wasn’t legitimate, and there was no telling what kind of meat I had just bought. My son, who had been so captivated by the salesman’s story, was devastated, asking, “Why would he lie to us like that?”
That moment was a wake-up call: High emotions and wise decisions don’t mix.
Looking back, I see that my emotions—admiration for the salesman, excitement about the deal, and the desire to impress my son—led me straight into a poor decision. While my loss was just a few hundred dollars, the consequences of emotionally driven choices can often be far greater.
Think about a time when you made a decision based largely on emotion. Did it lead to:
- Buying something you couldn’t afford, leaving you in debt?
- Entering or ending a relationship prematurely?
- Committing to something you didn’t actually want to do?
- Making promises you couldn’t keep?
If any of these resonate, you’re not alone. High emotions lead to shaky commitments—at best. At worst, they lead to broken or even harmful commitments.
One of the most tragic examples of this comes from the Bible, in the story of Jephthah (Judges 11). Jephthah was an outcast, rejected by his family and forced to build a life outside his home. But when his people found themselves at war, they turned to him for help, promising him a position of leadership if he would lead them to victory.
Desperate to secure his future, Jephthah made a reckless vow to God: “If you give the Ammonites into my hands, whatever comes out of the door of my house to meet me when I return in triumph will be the Lord’s, and I will sacrifice it as a burnt offering.”
He won the battle. But when he arrived home, the first thing to greet him wasn’t livestock—it was his only daughter. His emotional, spur-of-the-moment commitment cost him dearly.
How to Avoid Emotionally Driven Decisions
So how do we avoid making commitments we’ll later regret? Here are three key takeaways:
- Pause Before Committing – If your emotions are running high, step back. Whether it’s excitement, anger, fear, or desperation, give yourself time to cool down before making a decision.
- Weigh Your Words Carefully – Jesus taught us to let our “yes” be yes and our “no” be no (Matthew 5:37). Making emotional promises to God or others may feel sincere in the moment, but they can lead to guilt and regret if we can’t follow through.
- Align Commitments with Wisdom – If a commitment aligns with God’s word and leads to growth, honor it. But if it contradicts His wisdom or was made hastily under emotional pressure, reconsider before acting on it.
It’s natural to feel deeply and passionately. But wisdom calls us to step back and evaluate before making commitments. Emotions can be powerful motivators, but they shouldn’t be the drivers of our decisions. The next time emotions run high, take a breath, seek wisdom, and make choices that will stand the test of time.
