Reclaiming the Gift of Feeling
Insights from The Weekly REBOOT
By: Evan Owens
The Numbness of Emotional Burnout
Have you ever felt numb—like the emotional well has run dry? Life starts to feel flat, and the things that once sparked joy or sadness seem distant. For many of us, emotional numbness comes after pushing our emotions aside for too long, often as a result of burnout.
For nearly 15 years, we’ve worked with trauma survivors who struggle with two emotional extremes. Some of us wrestle with intense emotions—anger, sensitivity, frustration—while others feel nothing at all. Emotional burnout, where we go numb, can be just as painful and isolating as feeling too much. This is especially common among veterans, first responders, and trauma survivors, who often suppress their emotions as a survival mechanism.
But here’s the big question: What if you could feel again? What if you could embrace your emotions, heal from trauma, and still live a fulfilling life, whether in your career or retirement?
Why Emotional Burnout Happens and What It Looks Like
For many of us, emotional numbness starts long before trauma strikes. It can stem from growing up in an emotionally charged environment, where emotions were used as tools of control, or from a home where emotions were discouraged altogether. In either case, we never really learned how to process emotions in a healthy way.
As military members or first responders, emotions often take a backseat. You’re expected to remain calm and collected while everyone around you is reacting. Over time, this habit of “shutting down” becomes second nature. You may have convinced yourself that emotions and your career can’t coexist—that feelings could jeopardize your professional future. But that shutdown doesn’t come without consequences. Eventually, it can lead to emotional burnout.
If you find yourself feeling disconnected, unable to experience joy or sadness, and going through the motions of life, you’re not alone. And it’s okay to admit it. The emotional numbness many trauma survivors experience is a normal reaction to the stress and strain they’ve faced.
The Importance of Emotions—Why They Matter
Emotions are not the enemy. In fact, they are gifts given to us to help us process and navigate life. Every emotion—whether it’s joy, sadness, fear, or anger—has a purpose. The challenge comes when we suppress these emotions for too long, or when we only allow ourselves to feel anger or frustration. But, when we reclaim the full spectrum of emotions, we begin to heal.
If you’ve been numb for a while, you might feel like there’s no way to fix it. But think of emotions like a rusted machine—if you start tapping into your feelings, even the smallest bit, they will begin to move you forward. Emotional healing starts when we embrace the idea that emotions are not a burden to manage but blessings that help us process life’s ups and downs.
So, how do we get there?
Practical Steps to Reclaim Your Emotions
Here’s the good news: you can feel again. Healing from emotional burnout isn’t about forcing feelings to come back; it’s about creating space for them to return, gently and intentionally. Let’s break this down into three practical steps:
- Acknowledge That Emotions Are a Blessing
The first step to reclaiming your emotions is recognizing that they are a blessing, not a curse. Emotions are a natural part of God’s healing process. Whether you’re grieving a loss or rejoicing in a victory, emotions help us process life. Accepting this truth is the foundation of healing from emotional numbness. Action Step: Take a moment each day to check in with yourself emotionally. Ask, “What am I feeling right now?” It might be difficult at first, but even acknowledging your emotions can help open the door to healing. - Be Vulnerable
Feelings can’t show up if we keep them locked inside. To start feeling again, we must be willing to risk vulnerability. This might sound uncomfortable, but it’s necessary. Vulnerability is the key to unlocking the emotions that have been buried for too long. Action Step: The next time someone asks, “How are you?” don’t just default to “I’m fine.” Be honest. Share what’s really going on. It might feel awkward at first, but being vulnerable with someone you trust is a huge step toward reclaiming your emotions. If you’re not sure where to start, just say, “I’ve been struggling with feeling disconnected lately.” - Practice Gratitude
Gratitude is one of the most powerful emotions when it comes to healing. It helps us reconnect with what matters, bringing us back to life. When we’re numb, we often forget to appreciate the small blessings around us. Gratitude shifts our focus from what’s wrong to what’s right. Action Step: Start a daily gratitude practice. Take five minutes every day to list three things you’re thankful for. These can be simple things—like a good cup of coffee, a friend who checked in on you, or a quiet moment of peace. Gratitude opens the door to other emotions like joy, sadness, and hope.
Healing from emotional burnout and numbness is a process, and it takes time. Be patient with yourself. It’s okay if it feels awkward or difficult at first. But remember, emotions are God’s gift to us, and reclaiming them is a necessary part of the healing journey.
By acknowledging that emotions are blessings, embracing vulnerability, and practicing gratitude, you’re creating the conditions for healing and emotional wholeness. Over time, you’ll begin to feel again—not just in the big moments, but in the everyday moments of life.
Embrace the Full Range of Emotions
You don’t have to stay stuck in emotional numbness. You can feel the full range of emotions again and live a life full of meaning and connection. It’s not about feeling all the time; it’s about feeling when it matters most—when you’re healing, growing, and reclaiming the joy that’s rightfully yours.
So, take the first step today. Ask yourself, “How am I really feeling?” Be honest, be vulnerable, and practice gratitude. Little by little, your emotional machine will start running again, and life will feel vibrant once more.
